| 1. | physical suffering or distress, as due to injury, illness, etc. |
| 2. | a distressing sensation in a particular part of the body: a back pain. |
| 3. | mental or emotional suffering or torment: I am sorry my news causes you such pain. |
Urban Dictionary's Definition of pain: What happens when you reach into the blender to dislodge a stuck ice cube without unplugging it first
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So what truly causes pain? I guess if it is an injury I have suffered a lot of pain over the last year. A distressing sensation, I assume is the same as and injury. Mental or emotional suffering or torment- that's something everyone gets everyday. It's what I hate most about life.
A little more then a year ago a major event in my life caused a change in the way I saw life. I blew out my knee... and for those of us who are going WTH does that mean, well I'll tell you. I tore my ACL, which is a ligament in you knee. It is a common injury among female players. Something to do with our hips (what's new). Well, I tore it. Six weeks later and tons of physical therapy I was ready for surgery.
Surgery! Scary, right? I slept through the whole thing. Like a baby. The three days that followed were the worst. I was condemned to sitting in a chair while watching a kid series (Avatar: The Last Airbender if you were wondering) that my family had bought me because the Direct TV box wasn't hooked up to the room I was stuck in. I had a huge brace which was not my size... a catheter... an ice machine... and one swollen knee. Oh and a lot of pain killers!
The next three weeks was spent in the oversized metal clunking brace while also doing physical therapy. Something I continued to do for the next six months.
That year I gave up a lot of things. But I guess you could say I had a lot of support. I wasn't aloud to play soccer. So I became like an assistant coach and I felt like I helped out the team as much as I could. The next season (basketball) I was able to play. But my coach who had torn his ACL so many time to a point where he barely had any ligament left would barely give me any playing time.
I was fortunate enough to play indoor traveling soccer and we won the division. Oh, and I forgot to mention that I wore a big brace (a different one then the one I wore after surgery) on my bad leg. (I also had to wear it to gym- the first day I wore it someone called me robo-leg) Next was softball and spring soccer. Again I was never the best at softball but I gave it my all. I'll always remember one practice where the coach was mad because we had done poorly in a game. He made us do insane running drills. I had reached my limits barely have way through. But it was a punishment for the team, and I was part of the team... so holding back tears I did my best and suffered with everyone else, refusing to give up.
Again traveling soccer. We came in 2nd... to last place. But in softball we went on to win the championship. I guess we were doing something right. That was the 2nd championship I had won wearing my brace.
That catches me up to this summer. I began rowing first for two weeks five times a week for an hour and 45 minutes. Then for four more weeks four times a week for an hour and 45 minutes. At the same time I was preparing for soccer. Participating in four practices a week, when I could sometimes rowing and soccer overlapped with each other.
This week is tryouts. Five days of hard core playing. I'm still wearing my brace, which does limit me in running and turning. I almost got it off but my doctor said he'd rather be safe then sorry and said I'll see you after the seasons over then we'll see about getting it off. As you can imagine...I was pissed.
Ok back to tryouts. First I want to say I wasn't aware that tryouts starts at 5:30 PM means tryouts start at 5:15 and if your not there on time that's one strike. (Well the strikes haven't been given out yet.) I also had a dentist appointment today which I drove straight to soccer making me get there at 5:35...yup I was late. And tomorrow I have another one, but this time I told the coaches that I was definitely going to be late. They said it was ok, so I hope it is.
The reason I explained all this is that I wanted you to get some idea of what I really want to talk about. In the last year I have encountered pain, disappointment, stress, and constant grouchiness (yes I admit it)... and all this while only being thirteen. Now I'm a year older, but things have changed. I have surgical scars on my knee... I feel pain when I pivot the wrong way... I've had to give up so many things... and somehow I found the nerve to keep going. To never give up. The only benefit of hurting my knee is now I know when it will rain.
Today at soccer we played 'Brazilian' style soccer. Meaning if you get the ball do some kind of fancy trick. I got the ball and was in scoring position so i tried to dribble past a couple upper-classmen. They went for the ball and my ankle of my bad leg got caught up with the ball and their legs, causing me to trip. A JR said be careful you don't want to hurt yourself you have rowing in the morning.
I know that she probably was just joking but a week ago she had made a comment about how I was cheating on 'texas getups' by using my hand to help me get up. I said well I can't bend my knee properly because of the brace so it's harder to get up. She said anything for you. I know, I know. I'm a puny freshman whose slow, has average soccer abilities, and wears a freaky brace. Well, I said it before I know my limits. That's why I didn't tryout for Varsity. I stuck with JV and Freshman team, and I've met a lot of nice people who really just want to play for the love of the game.
People don't always mean what they say. At least I hope they don't but still some should watch what they say. My knee may not be fully healed yet but I've worked hard to get to where I am and the fact that I'm able to play as well as I can now is due to hard work over the past year. I'm not perfect, I mean who is, but somethings hurt people in ways others can't understand. No one can compare to what I've been through unless they have had the same injury as me. So...
I'm here to say: I tore my ACL... I wear a freaky knee brace... I work through pain... And I keep going for the love of the game... And nothing is going to stop me.
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DAY 1: What causes pain in your life?
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